Love Hurts !

Sometimes love sure hurts ! But love is much more than feeling - it's a life-long commitment.

Mothers and fathers sometimes express the difficulties and heartaches of guiding their children through their teen years - " Maybe if they didn't love their children that much it wouldn't be so hard. "

Even though love brings pain and sorrow, what would life be without it ?

In his book The Four Loves, C.S. Lewis wrote :
"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully around with hobbies and little luxuries ; avoid all entanglements ; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness ...... The only place outside heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers ...... of love is hell."
To love is to take risks, to expose our hearts. Sometimes it hurts.

It hurt Jesus Christ, but He kept on loving - even at the cost of His life. And He asked us to

" love one another as I have loved you "[John 15:12].

Truly loving our spouse, that teenager, that neighbour, that colleague is Christlike, and it's better than locking your heart in the coffin of self-centeredness.

Paul showed us that LOVE is the most excellence way as being expressed in 1 Corinthians 13.

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Man's Choice or God's Choice

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To err is human .....

Who can hurt us more deeply than those with whom we have created bonds of affection ? They, our siblings, our best friends or even our parents are almost part of us. We idealise them and consequently raise our expectations of them. It's natural to want our lover (or loved ones) to understand, appreciate, and make us feel secure by their commitment and constant presence.

Nothing is quite so painful as being betrayed by someone we hold in high regard - a spouse who cheats, a friend who runs us down, the colleague who unfairly takes credit for our contribution.

There's no doubt that abuse between people who have a responsibility to love each other can be counted among the cruellest and most reprehensible of offences.

Forgiveness that doesn't fight injustice, far from being a sign of courage and strength, shows weakness and false tolerance. It encourages the offender to perpetuate the crime. Forgiving is not the same as excusing them from their moral responsibility. How can we even consider forgiving when we are continuously subjected to abused ?

When someone close hurts our physical, moral or spiritual integrity, we feel assaulted, bruised, violated ... the offender's malice touches the most intimate parts of our being. The offence shakes our innermost peace and harmony, shatters our tranquility and threatens our diginity. Our shadow side emerges.

Emotions we thought we had under control suddenly begin to run amok. Our first reaction may be revenge or to build a wall to dull our self against the pain.

It's impossible to go back after we've been wronged. Either we try to make ourselves believe nothing happened, in which we re-establish the relationship in the context of a lie, or we take advantage of the conflict to review the quality of the relationship and renew it on more solid footing. Can we do this if our partner feels no remorse ? What does pardon consist of ? Not making someone pay. Decision made not out of grim determination, but because we want to heal and grow. We choose to believe in the dignity of the person who hurt, oppressed, or betrayed us.

Behind the spiked veil, we see a fragile person ... like ourselves, capable of changing and evolving. That's why I think forgiveness is the rainbow connecting humanity and the Divine, impossible without Spirit.

To free our offender, we must be free ourselves. What do we forgive ourselves for ? For putting ourselves in situations where we let ourselves be hurt, for putting ourselves down by buying into our attacker's insults, for feeling vulnerable and wanting to stay in love.
[Extracted from Sunday People by Tessie Lim dated 28June 2009]

Philip Yancey listed 3 pragmatic reasons to forgive :-

First - Forgiveness halts the cycle of blame and pain, breaking the chain of ungrace.
Second - Forgiveness loosens the stranglehold of guilt in the perpetrator.
Third - Forgiveness creates a remarkable linkage, placing the forgiver on the same side as the parity who did the wrong.

Matthew 6 : 12 Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.

He is Enough

In Christ, God proclaimed once more that the good life He wants for us is not about rules or material possessions but a relationship.
While having wealth is not condemned in Scripture as long as priorities are in order and the needs of others are addressed, those of us with relative wealth must remind ourselves that Jesus - not riches - sustain us.
The purpose of blessing from God is so that we can be the channel of blessing to others.

God's love does not keep us from trials; it helps us get through them.

God hasn' t promised to keep us from problems & trials BUT He has proven that He is always " for us " as Christians by what He did through Jesus (Romans 5 : 8-9). Nothing, not even death, can separate us from His love (Romans 8 : 35-39).

Does God Hate ?

You may have read that " God is Love " [1 John 4 :8 ].
But did you know that God also hates ?

God loves people, but He hates their wicked deeds.
He hates seven things, and these things are :-
1) Pride
2) Lying Tongue
3) Murder
4) Wicked Thoughts
5) Mischief
6) False Witness
7) Troublemaking

Proverbs 6 : 16-17 There are six things the LORD hates, seven that are detestable to him : haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked schemes, feet that are quick to rush into evil, a false witness who pours out lies and a man who stirs up dissension among brothers.

Facebook

Tonight [07-08-09] I finally joined facebook with the help of my daughter.

Now to start keeping myself busy with more networking !!

Monk with the 5C's

A Buddhist monk for 25 years, former Ren Ci Hospital chief, Ming Yi [a.k.a. Goh Kah Heng] who is on a criminal trial achieved the Singapore dream of the five Cs. He had cash - at one stage, he had S$570,000 (RM$1.39 million) in his personal bank account, credit cards - at least nine from various banks and condominium units - he bought and sold at least six private properties in Singapore and Australia over 20 years.
He had cars - he bought at least three BMWs in six years and a prestigious country club membership.

That is his journey of faith ! Then what is ours ?

I believed as a follower of Christ, ours should be Conversion, Communion, Conviction, Contentment and Character.
We are converted to have communion with God our Creator. We must always have the conviction of sins beside being contented with the blessing bestowed on our lives. Lastly, our character should be always improving to be more Christ-like as we journeyed on.

The treasures of Egypt [Hebrews 11:26] such as Cash, Credit Card, Car, Condominium and Club Membership [Prestige] are just temporal in nature. They can be destroyed by moth and rust, and also stolen by thieves. [Matthew 6 : 19-20]

The temporal promises as we journey on earth are to bring us closer to God. It is not wrong to have it but it is no longer important as we set our focus on God.
James 1 : 17 Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

There is nothing good coming to us without God being the source.
Job 1 : 21 "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised."

[Extract from article written by Carolyn Quek]

Is internet addiction real ?

WHAT IS INTERNET ADDICTION?
Internet Addiction - are essentially terms that have been applied to those that spend excessive amounts of time online at the expense of and to the detriment of other aspects of their lives. The obsessive behaviour takes the form of particular activities, and might include any or all of the following :
• Relationships: spending excessive amounts of time starting and maintaining online friendships
in chat rooms, which replace real-life friends and family.
• Money : compulsively gambling online, trading online, and partaking in online auctions.
• Information searching : compulsive web surfing or database searches.
• Gaming: obsessive computer game playing, including multi-user games.
• Sex : addiction to adult chatrooms, cyber sex or pornography on the Internet.
There has been an increasing amount of attention given to this phenomenon, and attempts to quantify the problem have produced some staggering statistics: for example, figures suggesting that as many as 6-10% of the 189 million US Internet users have a dependency on the Internet, and there are as many as 1 million German Internet addicts. There have also been cases recorded of addiction to texting on mobile phones. [© Childnet International 2006.]

While Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia terms internet addiction disorder (IAD), or more broadly Internet overuse, problematic computer use or pathological computer use is excessive computer use that interferes with daily life.

Psyciatrist, Dr Muhammad Muhsin Ahmad Zahari, deputy chief coordinator at University Malaya Centre of Addiction Sciences defined internet addiction as a maladaptive use of the internet that leads to social and functional impairment.

Internet addiction is on the rise in the world's largest Net market, and now Chinese doctors have officially defined it as an ailment.
Users who spend six hours or more per day online, and exhibit at least one symptom including difficulty sleeping or concentrating, yearning to be online, irritation, and mental or physical distress are classified as meeting the definition of addiction.
Being hooked on the Internet has been considered a problem in Chinese society as early as 2005, when the first clinic dedicated to Internet addiction opened in Beijing. It began accepting patients who exhibited dependency symptoms for those of substance abuse.
China also has "boot camps" designed to help addicts kick the habit by helping to change their routine.
About 10 percent of China's 253 million Internet users exhibit some form of addiction to the medium, and 70 percent of those people are young men, an official Xinhua News Agency report said.
So is internet addiction real ? Yes, I believed it is.

So to avoid this addiction why not get addicted to JESUS instead. Because only Jesus can fill any vacumn that you have in your life.

Old and abandoned

The Sunday Star "Old and abandoned" highlight the rising cases of forsaken seniors in government hospitals. In the first five months of this year, Kuala Lumpur Hospital topped the list, registering 134 such cases against 120 cases, a 12% increased while Penang Hospital reported 114 cases for the whole of 2008.

Children who could or would no longer bear the cost of taking care of their aged and infirm parents are treating hospitals like a 'dumping ground' because food, shelter and medication are provided by the Government. And it saves them the hassle of applying for places for their parents in government-run welfare homes.

Good family values like filial piety must be inculcated from young, said Health Minister, Datuk Liow Tiong Lai while experts advise parents to nurture a strong bond with their children from young to avoid being abandoned later.

But there are also cases of parents not loving their children leading to them [the parents] being abandoned when they are old and their health deteriorating. Parents need to sow love and care to their children when they are still young and the bible promises that they will reap abundantly of it when they are old. For ever action there has a reaction.

Galatians 6 : 7 Do not be deceived : God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.

The bible recorded in Exodus 20 : 12 and Deuteronomy 5 : 16 to "Honor your father and mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you."

Ephesians 6 : 2-3 Honor your father and mother — which is the first commandment with a promise that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.

Can we end our own lives ?

World renowned orchestras conductor, Sir Edward Downes and his wife, Joan decided to die together two weeks ago at a Zurich clinic run by the assisted suicide group, Dignitas. They drank a small amount of clear liquid and died hand-in-hand with their two adult children by their side.
Sir Edward was almost blind and growing deaf while his wife was diagnosed with terminal cancer. After 54 happy years together, they decided to end their own lives rather than continue to struggle with serious health problems, said a statement from the couple's children.
In Britain, people are now debating whether they should be allowed to help ailing loved ones end their lives. I think we should not play God but let God be God. It is God that gives lives and man have no right to decide when to end it unless God say so.
Job 34 : 14 - 15 If it were His intention and He withdrew His spirit and breath, all mankind would perish together and man would return to the dust.
Job 1 : 21 Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised."
Job 33 : 4 The Spirit of God has made me; the breath of the Almighty gives me life.